By Christopher “Flood the Drummer®” Norris
9.15.14: Global – (Lifestyle): I was raised on the idea that if you spare the rod, than you spoil the child. And in that context, I was surely not spoiled.
My mother, a god-fearing single woman, believed in physically disciplining me and my brothers and the weapons of choice ranged from belts, to extension cords and sometimes a switch from the tree that I’d have to actually fetch – I always looked for the smallest branch, which actually made matters worse.
The bible, which was used in my home as often as the remote control, justified our corporal punishment. According to the good book of Proverbs, chapter 13, verse 24:
“He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes.”
A more modern translation says:
“If you don’t punish your children, you don’t love them. If you do love them, you will correct them.”
Additionally, Proverbs, the 23rd chapter, verses 13 and 14, says:
“Withhold not correction from a child: for if thou strike him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and deliver his soul from hell.”
Even to this day, my mother – who at one point in our lives carried around a wooden paddle called the “Attitude Adjustment,” which me and my brother would hide in the basement to delay the inevitable – stands by her decision to use godly force when we were younger.
“The backside was made for spanking,” she told me, when I informed her I was writing this piece.
I must say, however, that although I’m critical of her choices, before I did something stupid in school or in public – which wasn’t often – I thought about the consequences and what my interactions with her would be, and it usually deterred me.
I’ve battled internally with how I will discipline my children, as I think I grew up to be an upstanding citizen who understands right from wrong and heavily weighs the consequences before I act.
I don’t think physically disciplining your child should be demonized, as discipline and tough love is a part of life, as is a critical component to raising leaders. But moderation and clarity is key, and not beating your child when you’re angry or with closed fist and random household appliances and cords is important.
Again, I don’t know if I’ll physically discipline my children, put them on punishment or just talk to them and express my disappointment, but whatever my decisions will be, my child will understand two things: I love them with my life and for every action is a re-action.
This article appears as part of a parenting series by Techbook Online entitled “Are You Raising Losers or Leaders?”
Thanks for reading. Until next time, I’m Flood the Drummer® & I’m Drumming for JUSTICE!™
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